Taking the decision to sign up to married dating sites should be approached with the same mind-set as one would approach the very most important lifetime decisions. Those who choose simply to ‘take the plunge’ without giving thought as to how they are going to successfully manage their affair are risking a great deal, not just in regards to being ‘caught out’, but also making the conduct of the relationship unnecessarily stressful and ultimately not much fun for either party. Naturally, this is the very antithesis of what an affair dating should be. However, the good news is that by following a few simple rules to the letter, an affair will feel more secure, be a hell of a lot more fun, and is likely to last a great deal longer.
1) Secure communications
It may sound a little ASIS but the reality is that couples who fail to practice safe coms are almost inevitably going to be rumbled sooner or later. Long gone are the days of leaving scented notes in the mailbox, the reality today is that people have never been more accessible to each other – or, for that matter, easier to spy upon. Ideally keep emails to the site where you have met your partner as at least this is entirely ‘in-house’, but remember to always close browser windows, frequently clear browser caches and if at all possible keep all contact to one exclusive device that is never to be shared. Smart phones are ideal, but ensure they are password protected and not tethered to any form of contact/photo/message tethering software that will automatically copy them to shared devices.
2) Keep up appearances
It doesn’t matter whether you are enjoying a wonderful marriage and just fancy a little fun on the side, or if you are essentially separated yet cohabiting out of other commitments, the fact is that if an affair is to be kept on the quiet it’s essential to maintain what appears a normal life. Such is the thrill of entering into a lively affair that it can be surprisingly easy to slip into a more hedonistic lifestyle that may quickly be picked upon by friends, family and colleagues. Being able to carry on a normal productive lifestyle is one of the great joys of having an affair dating, because only one other person knows the secret.
3) Manage the risk
Often the greatest hurdle to overcome when starting an affair is the persistent fear of being ‘spotted’ when out and about in public. The only way to approach this is through playing the percentages, and being aware that it is essential to use some imagination when determining where and when to meet up. Purely sexual affairs need only worry about a restaurant and hotel a little way out of town, but the reality is that quite often these relationships start to demand a little more than quick, casual hook-ups. For those playing the ‘just friends’ card, it can be much easier to pass off any unexpected encounters with associates while out on the town, but remember to keep physical contact to a stolen minimum. It makes later on much more fun!
4) Never tell a soul
Without doubt this is the one of the most important rules of conducting a successful affair, for the moment it is confided to anyone else not only have you broken the seal of discretion that you owe the other party, but also inflicted a burden of unnecessary responsibility upon the person who you disclosed the relationship to. Even the most sympathetic best friends should not know about the affair, as even if they promise to keep quiet there is always a chance that they will have a slip of their tongue. Remember that, as paradoxical as it may sound, an affair is the ultimate form of trusting relationship and it must always be protected by a veil of unimpeachable privacy and respect.
5) Establish and affirm boundaries in the relationship
Once an affair is up and running it can be a quite magical thing, and it is easy to lose sight of what the purpose of seeking out the relationship was in the first place. Any couple who have courted online and then successfully hooked up in the real world should be wise to the fact that desires and ambitions may change over the course of their relationship and that sooner or later they will likely become unrealistic for one of the parties. An affair should be approached as the ultimate form of a relationship, a few stolen hours of maximum intrigue, lust and enjoyment of each other’s company – anything further needs to be taken firmly in the slow lane over a long period of time.Tags: affair dating, affair dating sites, dating married man, dating married woman, married man affair