How to Cope With The Affair Dating Guilt

Posted by Marital Affair
Posted: August 7, 2014

Having an affair dating can be a lot of fun and a great way to deal with not feeling completely sexually satisfied by your partner. However sometimes it comes with the unwanted extra baggage of guilty feelings. You may feel bad about stepping outside of your relationship, or maybe you feel like a hypocrite around other people. Usually these feelings have to do more with meeting other people’s expectations than how you view your own situation.

affair dating

Confide In A Trusted Friend

Sometimes keeping things to yourself is the best way to maintain your privacy, but it can also take its toll emotionally. If you have a friend that you are certain you can trust, maybe one that is in the same situation as yourself or has been in the past, you should consider confiding in them. It will provide you with someone who you can vent to and unburden yourself to without having to worry about negative consequences. It’s usually best if this person is friends with just you and not your partner, as this eliminates loyalty conflicts that could become an issue. The most important thing is that this is someone you can trust, either because they can’t compromise you without you revealing a secret of theirs or because of the nature of your relationship.

Avoid People Who Are Judgmental or Self-Righteous

If you’re going to have an affair, then you will have to make some sacrifices. You may need to cut some people and activities out of your life. If you are someone who is involved with a church, the reality is that this is going to be a constant source of guilt for you and you may have to limit your involvement. You’ve already chosen to adhere to your own standard of behaviour and values, and you don’t need to be around people who are constantly judging your actions to be wrong.

Be Careful and Thoughtful

The biggest source of guilt is usually about what you are “doing” to your partner. While having an affair, try to avoid pulling back from your current partner or making them feel unwanted if you’re not going to leave. If they are happy while blissfully unaware of your extracurricular activities, then you don’t have anything much to feel guilty over. They are happy, you are happy; everyone is a winner in this situation.

Make sure you are playing as safe as possible and that you are taking all the right precautions not to bring any problems home. Not only is this a good and healthy practice in general, but it will give you one less thing to be potentially guilty over. Try to avoid having affairs with people already in your mutual social circle, so that you can avoid additional anxiety and guilt. This will also reduce the amount of lying you have to do which will help matters as well.

An affair is supposed to be fun, so make sure you are doing everything you can to keep things light-hearted and uncomplicated.

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